The Legends of Christmas

Frosty – People just don’t get me. I get way too much attention and I don’t want it. Any of it. Rudolph – Yo man, I know just what you’re saying. Host – Hello ladies and gentlemen. We’re here at Straight Talk with a roundtable of some of the biggest legends of Christmas. To my…

I’m Gonna Lasso Santa Claus

This year I’m gonna get him. I thought I had the right idea last year but it didn’t work. I had made a net out of dad’s fishing line. Do you know how long it took me to put together? I spent weeks and weeks putting that thing together. My parents thought I was just…

Feliz Navidad

This year I am Joseph. No, I am not really Joseph, I am Mauricio Arenas. My wife really is Mary. Well, she’s Maria but that is close enough. Our daughter, Esperanza, gets to play the role of Jesus. Although, that doesn’t really make sense. Here I am, walking down the street like a pied piper…

The Christmas Song

Last summer while I was walking through Istanbul with a couple friends, I couldn’t help myself. Even though it was easily ninety degrees outside I started the Christmas Song. You know the one, “Although it has been said many times, many ways, ‘Merry Christmas, Merry Christmas to you’.” There was absolutely no way to avoid…

Grandma Got Run Over

It was a dark and snowy night. I know, I know, that sounds like the winter twist of an often overused horror cliche.  So what? It really was after dark and the snow coming down was blinding. It had not been so bad when Mildred left her daughter’s house about twenty minutes before. The storm…

Silent Night

My eyes had just shut down when a tiny voice crying out pried them back open. To my left, Joseph moaned and started to raise his head. “Shhhh. I’ve got this. You go back to sleep.” I kissed my husband on his shoulder as I dragged myself back up to my feet. He was already…

Let It Snow

It first happened this year on Election Day. It was the first Tuesday in November. I hate election day. I know, I know. Most of you are thinking, “so do I.” But my reasons have nothing to do with politics. I am not here to talk about our broken electoral system or the poor choice…